Grieving the Loss of Your Pet
Grieving the Loss of Your Pet
Ugh! It seems there is not much that is harder in this world than losing a pet. (If you are a person that says “It’s just an animal” then move on. You just won’t get this.) Those are our children. Especially for those who have kids that are grown and gone, or people living on their own.
Pets are unconditional love. We come home from work or the store and no one can be as happy to see us as our dog (and sometimes a cat. If they feel like it at the time.)
In my adult life, I have adopted or fostered more than 70 dogs. These were through rescues and dogs that were training to work with people that have physical disabilities. I have lost many pets in my lifetime. Dogs, rabbits, peacocks, chickens, ducks, pigs, you name it. And I cried with each one. I held a couple in my arms as they passed over the rainbow bridge. It still hurts at times. But I keep doing it. I keep getting more. You too?! Even though we have that heartache we often adopt again, because they give us so much joy.
So I imagine you are reading this because you have lost one of your fur babies yourself. Maybe it happened recently. Possibly it was years ago.
It hurts! It hurts like hell!!!
So you reach out. Some people are supportive. Some will listen and wait for their turn to tell you about their lost pet. Who doesn’t want to talk about their best bud? Maybe you get online to find others in the same boat. And here you are.
My name is Karen and I am a Licensed Clinical Counselor in Ohio and Michigan. I know about loss professionally and personally (wayyy to well). So let me give you a bit of info about loss.
You have heard about the stages of grief. Some say there are four or five and others say seven, maybe more. Let me explain them very briefly.
Denial-”This is not really happening”
Anger-”Why didn’t the vet save him/her?” “Why did God do this to me?”
Bargaining-”Please, I promise I will never yell at them again.”
Depression-”I am so sad without them.”
Acceptance-”It’s true. My pup is gone.”
You might add shock and testing to these stages.
You might not go through all and maybe not in that order.
I want to make a quick point that I feel is important to mention. Don’t deny your anger. If it is there then FEEL IT. Also, acceptance does not mean you are ok with what happened. It means you are accepting the reality that they are gone.
So what do I do now?
Don’t compare your grief to others
Accept your feelings. Do not deny them
Reach out to others
Do something to remember your pet. A plaque or have a funeral
Have a good cry when you feel like it
Get emotional help from a licensed counselor
It may not feel like it right now but it does get easier with time. Please reach out if you feel you could benefit from professional assistance. Also,
I am sorry about the loss of your fur baby.
Karen Michan MA, LPCC-S (OH) LPC (MI)
#SavingGraceTC
419.277.4355
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